Category: Humour
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Fecal E.Coli
Fecal E.Coli is the flagship product of the legendary Coca Coli Company. History In March, 1886, John Fecalshed was a poor dairyman in danger of losing his family farm. Pestilence had wrought illness within his herds and literally flooded the fields with diarrhea. Unable to afford to hire extra hands, the arduous task of cleanup…
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Franco-American War
Chronology March 13, 1982 A military force under the command of General Hector Boiardi (Italy) notifies the White House of its intention to launch an invasion of the mainland United States. US President Ronald Reagan puts the nation on alert and mobilizes all branches of the armed forces to create a defense perimeter and round-the-clock…
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The Truth About Proctology
Proctology is the branch of science encompassing the exploration and charting of deep crevasses, folds, flaps, abysses, fissures, caverns, chasms, gorges, holes, pits, and voids. History Proctology, like many other modern scientific disciplines can trace its roots back to Ancient Greece. It began, rather humbly, with pairs of friends exchanging impromptu examinations with the tools…
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To Be Announced
“I like ’em. They’re like, really good, eh?”” ~ Geddy Lee One of several musical groups given the moniker of “Canadian Power Trio” (despite the fact that they often have more than three members), To Be Announced (often shortened to TBA) is distinguished by their unique omnipresence — the ability to play multiple shows at…
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Stench
“Ooooh, that smell! Can’t you smell that smell?” ~ Lynyrd Skynyrd on Stench A pioneer British punk band formed in 1974, Stench is largely credited with starting the trend of naming yourself after something disgusting in order to sound anti-social. Copycat acts included: Vomit, The Boogermen, and Smegma. Origins Ralph Featherstonehaugh formed Stench as an…
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Store Wars
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Microsoft vs. GM
(I didn’t write this, and this is out of date but still contains some humour and/or truth) Once at COMDEX computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, “If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars…
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So you want to be a musician…
If you want to be a musician, be prepared to spend most of your time, at least initially, playing with yourself… Start a daily routine. Lock yourself alone in your bedroom (or even the bathroom). Take out your equipment. Always treat it with care. Remember, you want it to last a lifetime. Start out slowly,…
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I am Canadian
It’s not a just a slogan to sell beer. It’s a rallying cry. I love my country, and I’m proud to be Canadian. When the United Nations reports that Canada is the best country in the world to live in, I just smile quietly to myself, because it’s something that I’ve always understood at an…