Category: Humour
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Oscar Mayer
Early Years Not surprisingly, Oscar Mayer was born in Bavaria, Germany, the hotbed of tubular meat since the first ancient butchers looked down at the rubble of discarded organs and miscellaneous shavings at their feet and pondered, “How can I sell this?” Like most Bavarians, and indeed like most young boys worldwide, young Oscar’s fascination…
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Captain’s log
Captain’s log, Stardate: twenty-nine ninety-five plus tax. First Mission The USS Article is on its maiden voyage to the Gulagha System. While the vessel is incomplete at this time, having been pushed out of Stardock prematurely in order for another more important article to begin construction, engineers at Starfleet Headquarters have offered their sincerest assurances…
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The Root of All Evil
The Root of All Evil is a popular tourist destination located at the head of the Persian Gulf, on the modern-day shoreline north of the original site of the Garden of Eden (now submerged under the Gulf waters). Origin “The Root”, as it is colloquially known, was established in the year 277 Anno Mundi, or…
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Fozzie Bear
Fozzie Bear is an entertainment-industry veteran, and the star of a number of groundbreaking shows including Grizzly Adams, Mututal of Omaha’s Wilde Kingdom, and the 1979 John Frankenheimer film Prophecy. The Early Years Still erroneously believed to have been the sole handiwork of famed muppeteer Jim Henson in 1975, Fozzie was actually born in 1972…
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Dead Politicians Club
“Please leave the room if this will offend you.” ~ Budd Dywer on a .357 Magnum revolver Often said not to exist, or worse, dismissed as a cheap imitation of the more well-known Dead Rock Stars Club, the Dead Politicians Club was in fact the forerunner to many modern celebrity death clubs. Founding The club…
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William Shatner on William Shatner
“A true pilot must of necessity pay attention to the seasons, the heavens, the stars, the winds, and everything proper to the craft if he is really to rule a ship.” ~ William Shatner (excerpt from TekRepublik p. 487) William Shatner is the de facto philosopher king of the Utopian nation of Canada. His wit and wisdom became intrinsically…
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Pittsburgh Pirates
The name Pittsburgh Pirates refers to both the athletic club and the alumni of Pirate University (Pittsburgh)—a major league academic institution dedicated to the furtherance of piracy arts and sciences, and the preservation of pirate heritage into the 21st century. A second campus, Pirate University Tampa Bay, opened in 1976—on the 100th Anniversary of the…
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OCD
OCD or Omniscient Concept of Design is a paranormal ability whereby an individual possesses total knowledge of the intrinsic principles, processes, and design of the order of the known universe. Fear and misunderstanding of this special power has led to it being mislabeled in public society as obsessive-compulsive disorder. Origin Because it has been largely…
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R. L. Stine
R. L. Stine is another pseudonym of author Stephen King. Pseudonyms Considered by many as an adequate peddler of pedestrian prose, King’s main criticism by readers and publishers alike has not been his writing (though that does warrant strong objection), but his woefully slow novel output. In fact, King has published less than 70 books…