This past Saturday marked the end of my 9th week of diet and exercise. The scale read 194.2, a new low, for nearly 28 pounds lost so far. Just the boost I needed to reinforce my commitment to fruit, which has gone from an occasional diversion to a multiple-times-daily staple of my diet. If only I weren’t competing with other fruit lovers in my cubicle…
Until recently, I though that fruitflies were mythical creatures of legend like dragons or unicorns. I’d heard people talk about them, but I hadn’t really seen any. This might have had something to do with my old, largely fruit-free diet and my limit grasp of entomology… To my knowledge, there are no sausageflies or chipflies, and definitely no cookieflies or Cokeflies. Apparently there are popflies, but only in baseball.
But fruitflies do exist! And they love my office.
One day, there I was, eating some fruit, and one started buzzing around my head. Several more were zipping in and out of my trash bin. I dumped it immediately into the main waste collection for the office, and then got a good workout hopping and clapping to exterminate the little beasts.
Then all was well, and I endeavoured to empty my waste bin more often after that.
The next day I peeled an apple and was just settling back to enjoy it when–you guessed it–more fruitflies buzzing around my skull. Wastebasket in hand, I fled to the big bin, then returned to unleash my vengeance on the winged attackers.
Surely I’ve exterminated a small colony’s worth by now, I thought. I ate my afternoon orange in peace, and made sure to dump out my bin before leaving for the day.
The next day all was silent, until I started carving up an apple. Then, another sortie of attackers. I felt like King Kong. The apple was my object of desire, clutched carefully in my fingers, while my other hand waved menacingly at the circling aircraft.
It made me think: why fruit? Why is nature punishing me for good eating habits? Why not sausageflies, chipflies, and cookieflies?
I’m not making excuses, nor am I giving up. When my King Kong routine gets old, I’ll just switch to “When You’re Happy and You Know It”, content in the knowledge that I’m eating well and getting exercise while I do it.
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